Lost in Romance #32 – Dare to date your ex…?

It happens when you least expect it…that actual ‘sliding doors’ moment, when you catch sight of your ex across a crowded bar or dashing past you in the street. Either way he’s just as irresistible as ever and that flame you’ve been secretly burning for months (or sometimes years) explodes into full-on fireworks! Suddenly, unexpectedly, your ex is back in your life, and you begin to think ‘what if…?’ 

What if you dare to date your ex? It could be the best decision you’ve ever made…or absolutely the worst idea you’ve ever had. Is it destiny, or are we taking control of our own fate? All it takes is one tantalisingly tempting text message to connect the past with the present – and, who knows, even the future. It’s all turning vaguely Interstellar. But as the saying goes, ‘once bitten, twice shy’ if you’re really prepared to take that leap into the unknown, it’s certainly good advice to be cautious.

A leopard can’t change its spots, a zebra can’t change its stripes – but maybe Mr. X is the exception to the rule.  It’s the only way your relationship could survive a second chance at love, and all those wrongs need to become rights. Confused? So are we, daring to date your ex is a whole bundle of contradictions!

Just like an old pair of jeans, there’s all the signs of wear and tear – a rip of suspicion, a lost button of trust (very poetic, but you get the picture), and all we can really do is patch up those mistakes and pretend they never happened. The trouble is, we still know that they are there, and our relationship is forever more literally hanging by a thread. On the other hand, that pair of jeans is our favourite pair of jeans…comfy, familiar, the perfect fit.

Sometimes we’re willing to accept those patches, in dating your ex you’re not trying to recreate the old relationship – and with it comes a clarity of thinking unblinkered by crazy, passionate, out-of-control hormones. Hindsight is a beautiful thing and for once we’re given the chance to do things differently, to look at one another differently – to accept the flaws that irritated us the first time round and focus on everything we love about that person. Yet, there’s a fundamental clue in that previous sentence…it’s not the first time round. Never again will we experience that ‘first kiss’, the ‘first time’ or that tumbling cataclysmic sensation of falling in love. Does it matter? That’s up to you.

In Christmas Where They Belong (Romance, December 2014) Marion Lennox writes of a love worth fighting for. Julie and Rob McDowell couldn’t imagine life without each other. Until a tragic accident tore their family – and their marriage – apart. For four years they’ve been living separate empty lives, yet when news breaks of a bushfire heading straight for the Blue Mountains both are compelled to return and protect their past. But now they’re stranded together for Christmas! And suddenly Rob is determined to prove to Julie that there’s something else worth fighting for: their future!

Love is a gamble but sometimes it takes risking it all to finding everything you ever dreamed of… Destiny is a slippery little thing, and there’s no right or wrong answer – all you can do is trust in your heart, and maybe, just maybe…dare to date your ex!

 

 

 

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