How to survive the office Christmas party
Here at Paradise Heights, our Christmas party takes the form of lunch followed by fun, games and, inevitably, drinks. But partying with your colleagues isn’t always easy…so here’s our guide to making sure you come out of your Christmas do with your paper-hat-adorned-head held high!
Three months before:
Join the social committee.
Joining the social committee can go a long way when it comes to surviving the big day. Firstly, being a member means planning the activities – and if the very phrase ‘organised fun’ is enough to bring you out in a rash, pre-warned is re-armed. What’s more, joining the committee gives you unrivalled access to the seating plan, allowing you to position yourself oh-so-casually next to that guy, or oh-so-“unfortunately” several tables away from that colleague. Your ticket to fun.
One month before:
Chose the right lunch
‘Sure, turkey’s always nice, but they have a lovely looking sea bass this year.’ STOP! Admittedly, that elegant fillet on a bed of fennel might sound like a good idea now. But when literally everyone else on your table is being handed a Christmas dinner and you’re left with something that looks like it was inspired by Heston Blumenthal, you’ll regret it. Also, roast potatoes: perfect for soaking up the booze. Celeriac mash? Not so much.
One week before:
Plan your outfit.
Yes, we know, you’ve waited all year to wear those sparkly hot pants you bought in the January sales – but a pub lunch with the MD is neither the time nor the place. Remember: if group activities are on the menu you’ll almost certainly find yourself contorted in an unforeseeable way, possibly while trying to balance an orange on Jeremy from Marketing’s head.
On the day:
A combination of the promise of a delicious lunch, the nerves connected with any kind of speeches/awards/games and the ever-present anxiety about how many calories you’ve consumed this Christmas (and it’s only mid-December!) might mean you consider skipping your porridge. This is a bad idea, because empty stomach + wine = slurring into your soup. Not a good way to line yourself up for that promotion next year.
Around an hour in, you’ll probably start wondering why you don’t always have wine with your lunch. But with hours to go and, probably, some kind of mental endurance test to get through (can ANYONE remember how much Prince George weighed??), now’s the time to have a glass of some water. Honestly: you’ll thank us when you don’t somehow miss your mouth and end up with Stilton on your nose.
Most importantly: relax, and have fun
Yes, you’re with colleagues, but his is your chance to cut loose, eat a lot and drink enough to think that fake moustaches are genuinely hilarious. So enjoy yourself, be silly, and remember: even if you DO end up dancing on a podium in a pair of sequinned pants, it will all be forgotten by next year… (probably).