How to have a Mills & Boon Halloween

Kick the kids out

That’s right. When else do you get to shut them outside in the cold, send them begging and feel OK about it? Once they’re off annoying the neighbours instead of you, run yourself a bath and then run your eyes over a hot, billionaire playboy. So what if he’s also a shifter? He can do wonderful things with those teeth and if it all gets too much, he’ll be normal again by morning.

Bake a Sheikh

If you’re going to be giving away all your treats, the trick is to ensure you have a secret supply just for yourself. Any other person would probably be happy with a pack of double choc Hobnobs, but not the Mills and Boon reader. No. YOU will be baking gourmet cookies in the shape of rich, yet slightly arrogant Sheikhs and every time you take a bite, you’ll feel smug and just a little bit sexy inside.

Scare yourself and pretend you didn’t mean to

Your eyes are tired from reading your way into a fantasy world in which you went to see a hot-shot doc, who got you pregnant in the throes of passion. It’s a shame Halloween turned your thoughts towards him eating your flesh afterwards like a zombie. The Mills and Boon reader uses fear to her advantage. Lie with the one you love and put on Jim Harold’s Campfire podcast. Once you’re even more terrified by real-life ghost stories from around the world, hold your lover tight, make woe-is-me wimpy sounds and demand they make your fear disappear, once and for all.

Howl at the moon

Everyone else will think you’ve enjoyed one too many cups of pumpkin cider but in truth, Halloween is the perfect excuse for you to wander into the woods (a park will suffice for now) and display your loyalty to the werewolf pack you’ve been reading about. Should you howl loudly enough, you will be the craziest person around and therefore totally safe to remain there (sipping more cider) till your man-wolf comes to look for his half-faery, maybe a little bit vampire bride.

Trick or treat the adult way

Single? The smart Mills and Boon reader knows better than to search for love on apps like Match.com and Tinder. Love appears when we least expect it… except on Halloween. This is when you don that Regency gown (smeared in blood for good measure) and hunt your unsuspecting bachelor down house-by-house. You’re asking for treats, but what you’re really asking is “Are you a billionaire rake/sheikh/doctor/Lord and are you eventually going to marry me?” She who dares wins, ladies.

Happy Halloween! And for more Mills and Boon, follow our exploits on Facebook and Twitter.

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